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CELESTINA
SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
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Member Since: 2/2006
Member Since: 2/2006
193 Comments
PrintElevenish Ways To Kill A Peep
News Type: Event — Sun Mar 23, 2008 11:41 AM EDT
Exhibit 1. Bunny A has been isolated from his peers and doomed to suffocation. Note the alarmed look on all their faces.
Exhibit 2. Child's magnifying glass. Not quick enough.
Exhibit 3. Much better.
The end of Bunny B.
The beginning of a (very) slow death for Bunny C.
Bunny D gets toasty.
Bunny E looks a little uncomfortable.
Bunny F was one of my personal favourites.
It hurt me much more than it hurt him.
It takes rather a lot to squish a Peep.
Fire is always best. Bunny I took about 3 seconds to kill.
My minions.
Bunnies do not conduct. Silly.
Once more a happy family.
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So, it's Easter/Ostara/Spring Equinox/whateveryoucallit, and as usual the stores are full of symbolic representations of our gratitude for new life. Pastels, chocolate eggs, and the persistent Peeps. Yes, the gooey marshmallow "treats" which line up in their neat little rows behind their cellophane windows to peer blankly out into the world through their vacant eyes. They practically beg to be abused, with their conformist attitudes, insubstantial nature, and misprinted features. And, inspired by this effort, my family and I decided to accommodate their blatantly masochistic inclinations. Thus, the afternoon before Easter, we invested $2 in two packs of the "bunny" variety of Peeps, and proceeded to destroy them in the most creative ways we could imagine. What follows is a record of our efforts.
Our experiments began at 4:30 pm on March 22, 2008. All bunnies were given a letter by which they could be distinguished, painted on their little sugary bellies with green food coloring by my obliging son. Only one pack was lettered, as the other was actually destined to be consumed (possibly), in a new and ingenious manner (which will be detailed later). Pack one eventually held twelve yellow bunnies, their bellies proudly displaying letters "A" through "L". I like to think they volunteered for the experiment, and in those moments before the first bunny met a horrible end they were probably thinking how brave and proud they felt. You could see it on their stupid little faces.
Bunny A, it was decided, would be destroyed by suffocation. Hence, he was sealed in a Ziplock bag and left to slowly wither (Exhibit 1). Now, I know what you are going to say: Peeps don't breathe!! Yes, that occurred to us as well. But the simple fact is that Peeps are an unusual lifeform (I am not even sure they are carbon-based) and while no respiration is apparent to the naked eye, we felt we could not discount the possibility, and besides we thought it would be a lot of fun to watch them turn from yellow to blue. Therefore, Bunny A was set aside, and we shall return to him throughout this narrative.
Bunny B was destined to meet a much quicker and more dramatic end. It was decided that his doom would be melting by magnifying glass. As you can see from the pic to the right (Exhibit 2), we originally used a small, child's magnifying glass in an attempt to burn a hole through Bunny B's head. This, however, quickly proved unsatisfying (as we are BIG fans of immediate gratification (IG) around here), and we switched to a new and better tool (see next pic). The massive magnifying lens we wound up employing was satisfying, indeed, and very quickly reduced Bunny B to a thin framework of solid marshmallow surrounding a boiling, blackened core (you knew it was in there), releasing a considerable amount of foul-smelling smoke. It was at this point that it first occurred to me that any neighbors happening to look out their windows might be somewhat alarmed by our activities, but the only interference we encountered was from our cat, who apparently was not put off by the smell of burning bunny flesh. My son and I were so enthused about our progress that we would happily have continued until Bunny B was nothing but a smoldering pool of tar-like goo...but my husband reminded us that it was best to have some bunny remains for the money shot.
IG factor: 10
Destructive Power: 10
Overall Method Rating: 10
Update: Bunny A shows no signs of distress. /Update
High on the success (or possibly the fumes) of Bunny B's demise, we set out to do something entirely different with Bunny C. Bunny C, meet Corrosive Substance X (in this case, a serious dose of some of those "Scrubbing Bubbles" we love to let clean our showers). Sadly for Instant Gratification, Scrubbing Bubbles do not eat marshmallow as quickly as they eat mildew. They do, however, eventually take their toll. It took the better part of an hour, but eventually the Bubbles had eaten away Bunny C's yellow coat (revealing his true Aryan nature), and then proceeded to whittle away at the rest of him. I am pretty sure that had we left him alone with the Scrubbing Bubbles long enough, they could have managed to completely dissolve him overnight, but the fumes were driving me crazy and while I am fine with dissolving bunnies, I draw the line at giving myself a headache over it. @!$%# Bunny C. He can finish dissolving in the trash.
IG factor: 2
Destructive Power: 5
Overall Method Rating: 3
Update: Bunny A shows no signs of distress. /Update
On to Bunny D, whose exit was at least as satisfying as Bunny B. Bunny D was destined to be burned at the stake. It may seem a little overly dramatic, but I am here to tell you that if you have never burned anyone at the stake before, it really can't be dramatic enough. First, of course, was the matter of finding an appropriately sized stake. Popsicle sticks are ideally sized for burning Peeps, as it turns out. Wedged into a blob of modeling clay for stability (mustn't have the bunny's agonized writhing tip over the stake and end the show early), and with Bunny D securely tied around the ears and throat by twine, I felt we were as prepared as we could possibly be. My son had the job of building the pile of twigs and dried leaves which would take Bunny D out, but upon seeing his arrangement it occurred to me that the last thing I wanted to do was spend five minutes burning my fingers with my lighter while waiting for the damned twigs to catch. The whole thing was therefore doused with lighter fluid before ignition. And then the moment of truth, when the first lick of flame touched the pyre...and yes, it was everything we had hoped for. The bunny didn't so much howl in pain as slump in miserable defeat, it's foul guts burbling out through it's charred flesh. The whole thing was over in just a couple of minutes (luckily for Bunny D), but was definitely one of our greatest successes, for both IG factor and aesthetic appeal.
IG Factor: 10
Destructive Power: 10
Overall Method Rating: 10
Update: Bunny A shows no signs of distress. /Update
Bunny E was subjected to a special tool we had picked up particularly for the purpose of bunny torture experimentation. It was a small hand pump designed to be used for inflating balloons of some sort. My son was quite sure that we could blow up bunnies with it. I figured the bunnies were too porus, but I was willing to give it a shot. Therefore, Bunny E had the pump inserted into his...er...hindquarters, and we proceeded to attempt to inflate him. Much to my surprise, he actually did inflate somewhat. Unfortunately, Peep bunnies turn out to not be as flexible as you would think, and he also popped very quickly, and so rather than a bunny exploded in dramatic fashion, we wound up with a slightly imploded looking bunny full of holes. Lots of holes.
IG Factor: 5
Destructive Power: 2
Overall Method Rating: 3
Update: Bunny A shows no signs of distress. /Update
Bunny F met his end using more sophisticated technology: the food processor.
Seeing his little yellow face peering out throgh the side of the container, I almost had a stab of pity. Almost. And then I turned it on, and laughed and laughed. End result: many mangled bits, but best of all, you could still sort of see his face on one of them.
IG Factor: 10
Destructive Power: 9
Overall Method Rating: 9.5
Update: Bunny A shows no signs of distress. Goddammit. Not even a shade of green. /Update
With Bunny G we decided to fall back on an ages-old crowd pleaser: the power of acids and bases (we homeschool, remember...I don't know how many damned times I have mixed acids and bases for the amusement of innocent children). I hollowed out Bunny G as best I could and then, using a funnel, filled his little butt with baking soda. Once he was as packed as I could make him, we proceeded to drop him into a jar of vinegar. The results were...not what we had hoped for. He sort of putted around the jar for a while, propelled on a stream of his own chemical reaction, but then he just fizzled and laid there, despite my son's many insistences that we shake him up again. I suppose the vinegar might eventually have dissolved him, but one can only take looking at a smug Peep for so long.
IG Factor: 1 (sooo not worth your effort, and hollowing marshmallows is hard work)
Destructive Power: 1 (as in, really kind of not)
Overall Method Rating: 1 (this is generous, because it makes me feel better to say the damned bunny didn't win)
Update: Bunny A shows no signs of distress. #$%$%&&!!! /Update
Undaunted, however, we moved on to Bunny H, who we decided would be squished flat. What does it take to squish a Peep flat, you might wonder. Surely you have noticed their resiliency. You can drop them from thirty feet and they just insolently bounce. You can squish them in your hands, and they just rebound. We decided that we would settle for nothing less than flat. We began with a hardbound copy of the adventures of King Arthur (protected from bunny goo by a piece of cardboard). This had very little effect. We then proceeded to add a hardbound copy of Robert Heinlein's Outward Bound, and then both volumes of the OED. My son noted this was a heavy dose of knowledge (proving that bad, geeky puns are a genetic failing). The eventual weight piled on Bunny H was 25 pounds, and not only was he not flat, but he began to reform himself the moment the weights were removed. Clearly, this would not do. He was inspiring the other bunnies. They were regaining hope, and we could hear the squeaky refrains of "Nobody Knows" drifting from the Peep box. In a moment of desperation, we did the only thing we could think of: we took the little bastard outside and ran him over. There was no popping back from that. The remaining Peeps were sufficiently cowed, and more importantly shut the @!$%# up.
IG Factor: 5 (it takes a long time to squish a Peep)
Destructive Power: 5 (assuming you don't freak out and use the car)
Overall Method Rating: 6 (I'm upping this a bit, as I feel that we probably could have used bricks or something and made a better go of it...but then again, you have no idea how madness feels until you hear four tiny Peeps singing in solidarity.)
Update: Bunny A shows no signs of distress. Yeah, I know. /Update
With Bunny I, then, we returned to a variant of the most satisfying of our experiments thus far: fire. With a fondue fork and a propane torch, we proceeded to roast the bunny 'till boils popped out all over his body and finally he fell (stretchy tendrils trailing marshmallowy goodness) to the asphault. The neighbors were looking out their window for this one (at least in my imagination), but no one deigned to save the bunny, so they are now as guilty as I. I will remind them of this the next time they @!$%# about my unmowed lawn...
IG Factor: 10 (this is as instant as it gets)
Destructive Power: 10 (see above)
Overall Method Rating: 9 (Dropped a point, just 'cuz it was over too quickly. I mean, IG is one thing, but Bunny I didn't even stick it out 10 seconds. Where's the fun in that?)
Update: Bunny A shows no signs of distress. Of course he doesn't. He's made of marshmallow. He doesn't breathe. /Update
Carrying on with spreading the culpability as widely as possible, for Bunny J I enlisted the help of two very willing assistants: Lelu and Kadoonis, our dogs. They were quite willing to help. Holding Bunny J between them, I had visions of his little body stretching out in slow motion as each dog took an end and pulled away from the other. Naturally (given the "snarf now, barf later" inclination of dogs), this did not happen. Each dog grabbed a side and bit it off in less than a heartbeat, and Bunny J met the quickest end of any of our subjects (each side being subsequently swallowed in the rest of that heartbeat). I was a little annoyed by the dogs' lack of style, but they didn't seem to give a @!$%#. They rarely do.
IG Factor: 10 (Did I say that propane was as instant as it gets? I lied.)
Destructive Power: 10.5 (there was one crumb remaining. I had to risk my arm to get it.)
Overall Method Rating: 10 (I guess. If you just want to @!$%# something up, there's nothing better than dogs. Aesthetics suffer a bit, though.)
Update: Bunny A shows no signs of distress. Is it me? Did I do something wrong? Why isn't he suffering? /Update
Bunny K was our biggest failure. We wanted to electrocute him. We really did. But my co-conspirator (read: much more sensible husband) was reluctant to carry out my plan, which involved running a copper wire through Bunny K's head and connecting each end to the car battery charger. He suggested a 9-volt battery. Which I obligingly bought, and which did nothing. Nothing. At all. Diddly-squat. Bunny-@!$%#ing-K survived. He would have been toast if I had had my way with him, but whatever. I'm not bitter, or anything.
IG Factor: 0 (seriously, marshmallow does not conduct)
Destructive Power: 0 (not even a little bit of melting)
Overall Method Rating: 0 (Just don't bother. Unless you have a battery charger, which I swear would have worked.)
Please note: Mr. Interference also took all these pictures. Which are brilliant, and none of this would have been nearly as impressive without his efforts. He still bears responsibility for the survival of Bunny K, though. He also, possibly, bears responsibility for my survival, which is a matter I will leave between him and his conscience.
Update: Bunny A shows no signs of distress. Yeah, because there's a hole in the goddamned bag. Of course. This is why we need better science funding. @!$%#s. /Update
Bunny L. Not satisfied with the slow progress of Bunny C, I decided a trip to the grocery store was in order to obtain more toxic substances than I normally ever allow in my house. I bought some off-brand version of Drain-O. I figured, there's nothing out there I can purchase without winding up on some damned list more evil than Drain-O. Upon arriving home (with a bottle of Scotch for me and some rum for my stalwart spouse, because science is hard work), we filled a small glass jar with the evil substance and lowered Bunny L into it by a rope tied around his ear. The results were disappointing. I mean, this @!$%# is supposed to eat through whatever you can fit down your drain, right? Quickly, one presumes. But no...Bunny L lingered. And lingered. And lingered. Until it got a little ridicuous. Until we had thrown all the other damned bunnies away, and put a lid on his damned jar, because we couldn't quite accept that he was not yet dead. His howls will haunt my nightmares, and apparently my waking life as well, because despite drain-clog-removal claims apparently you cannot really dissolve marshmallow with drain de-cloggers. Why? I don't know. Perhaps Peeps are immune to such things. Perhaps, if you want to build a cataclysm-resistant house, you should build it out of Peeps. Perhaps they are protected by God (who is currently not talking to me, so he didn't respond to my calls). @!$%# if I know. All I can tell you is that, if you want to kill a Peep, don't bother with the corrosive substances. The goddamned Peeps have a saving throw you can't beat.
IG Factor: nonexistent
Destructive Power: small enough to make you scared
Overall Method Rating: Just don't. Seriously. It makes you wish you were made of marshmallow, which is never a good thing.
Summary
After trying many different methods of disposing of Peeps, I have to conclude that fire is always the best. They are remarkably resistant to chemical dissolution, squishing, and pretty much anything else you can throw at them. Fire, however, is their Achilles' heel, their Kryptonite, their Necronomicon. In other words, if you want to kill a Peep, fire is the one damned thing they cannot resist. They do exhibit a remarkable degree of solidarity, possibly resulting from the fact that they are joined at the hip from their inception on, but it is important not to let them intimidate you. There is something in their brown little eyes that wants to make you feel guilty, but you must remember that they are marshmallow, and you are human. It is true that one day we may reach a point of enlightenment where we recognize that just because a creature is made of marshmallow, rather than carbon-based flesh, that is no indication of intelligence or feeling. But so far we have not reached that point, so all of you stalwart experimenters should stand firm in the knowledge that you only know what you know, and what you know is that science is fun.
Oh, and always check your damned equipment for holes.
About that other pack...
Oh, right. The other pack. Yep. Later today. I promise...
82 Votes- Enjoy this article? Help vote it up the 'Vine.
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{"commentId":1610982,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
These are just some of the pics. In a moment of blatant self-promotion (feel free to report me), I am including a link over to my website, where there are more pics and even one terribly funny video. Funny, that is, if you are the sort of sick bastard that wants to see a bunny in a blender.
{"commentId":1610982,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"celestina"}
- 11 votes
#1 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 11:44 AM EDT{"commentId":1611131,"authorDomain":"LAUHAL63"}
Oh, the humanity!!!!!
{"commentId":1611131,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"LAUHAL63"}
- 9 votes
{"commentId":1611777,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}
What have you done to my peeps!!? This is brilliant and disturbing. Man, I thought my
easter experiment was weird but you have my beat. Clipped to Newsviner's Picks.
{"commentId":1611777,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"sbutki"}
- 10 votes
{"commentId":1613942,"authorDomain":"nitewingsg1"}
UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM Peeps...
{"commentId":1613942,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"nitewingsg1"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1619653,"authorDomain":"tang"}
You forgot the sharks with fricking lasers on their foreheads (or at least ill-tempered sea bass).
{"commentId":1619653,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tang"}
- 8 votes
{"commentId":1619720,"authorDomain":"hemphill"}
dude, we don't have sharks here. She could use deer or maybe squirrels.
{"commentId":1619720,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"hemphill"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1648504,"authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
-Dave
{"commentId":1648504,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1648522,"authorDomain":"hemphill"}
love the tat...
{"commentId":1648522,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"hemphill"}
{"commentId":1648930,"authorDomain":"cobbs"}
What tat?
{"commentId":1648930,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"cobbs"}
{"commentId":1649136,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
What tat?
I thought your eyes were getting better with age? Or does this just show your REAL priorities. LOL Can't see the tat for peeps.
{"commentId":1649136,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 2 votes
{"commentId":1649221,"authorDomain":"cobbs"}
Sorry. I'm easily distracted by bright shinny things. And women are all bright shinny things.
BTW I've got a bushel of tats and was wondering where I could trade them for the other things? I know some guy that will give me fuel if I show him some.
{"commentId":1649221,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"cobbs"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1649239,"authorDomain":"paperdragon"}
Well, well. I just found the one thing that would get me to actually eat those damn peeps....
{"commentId":1649239,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"paperdragon"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1649417,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
I just found the one thing that would get me to actually eat those damn peeps....
Sure, cuz it's the peeps you'd be eating. ::laugh::
{"commentId":1649417,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1649451,"authorDomain":"paperdragon"}
Well, at first.
Get those damn peeps outta my way...
{"commentId":1649451,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"paperdragon"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1649652,"authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
Jesus one picture of peep panties and the comments section gets right underway again.
"Peepanties".... no definately not, really really not.
Peepkini. Perfect.
-Dave
{"commentId":1649652,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1649820,"authorDomain":"hemphill"}
come now, don't you want them with flavouring?
{"commentId":1649820,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"hemphill"}
- 1 vote
{"commentId":1611008,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
YAY peep torture and sacrifice!! Oh, these are cute. Have you seen Twinkie Torture?
{"commentId":1611008,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 7 votes
#2 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 11:53 AM EDT{"commentId":1611024,"authorDomain":"RebelGirl"}
Hysterical, amazing how the sugar and marshmallow carmalize...
{"commentId":1611024,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"RebelGirl"}
- 4 votes
#3 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 11:59 AM EDT{"commentId":1611031,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1611095,"authorDomain":"cobbs"}
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The horror!!!
What kind of sick bastard thinks of how to torture innocent peeps (that could be all nice and snug in my belly)?
Very creative BTW
{"commentId":1611095,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"cobbs"}
- 5 votes
#4 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 12:32 PM EDT{"commentId":1611329,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1611362,"authorDomain":"cobbs"}
Well, I'm (mrrmmph) killing (swallow) them (munch) as fast (slobber) as I can (wheeze)
{"commentId":1611362,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"cobbs"}
- 6 votes
{"commentId":1612251,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1611130,"authorDomain":"LAUHAL63"}
WTF? Have you joined the evil winsome-djeuhty tandem of defenseless creature torture? Bwwwwaaaaahahahahaha!
{"commentId":1611130,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"LAUHAL63"}
- 11 votes
#6 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 12:46 PM EDT{"commentId":1611722,"authorDomain":"djehuty"}
Those people (one of them anyway) loved it, and in fact used it as an instructional tool for their children. Who loved it too! See how the evil spreads? It's all your fault, C.
Verdict around here? Hilarious! We wished you had more videos, though.
Happy spring celebrations of whatever kind :)
{"commentId":1611722,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"djehuty"}
- 8 votes
{"commentId":1611843,"authorDomain":"djehuty"}
Happy Spring-Thing to you all, too!
Autumn, making the various chocolate birth analogues rather anachronistic. So lay down a good nitrogenous manure pile (for the saltpetre) and keep an eye out for flowers of sulphur in the rocks nearby, then perhaps we can set them to creating the ultimate "shock and awe" for peeps. They're clearly devil-spawn. The peeps, at any rate ;)
{"commentId":1611843,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"djehuty"}
- 8 votes
{"commentId":1612118,"authorDomain":"mog"}
lol, this is wonderful! Pity we don't get such things here, as they seem fun to destroy. I don't think the usual cylindrical marshmallows would give quite the same satisfaction. There must be some Easter candy around here the deserves such treatment!
...... I'm not really doing much to refute the claims of corruption and evil, am I? Dammit.
{"commentId":1612118,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"mog"}
- 6 votes
{"commentId":1612132,"authorDomain":"djehuty"}
You read xkcd, Mog. It's way too late for you ;)
{"commentId":1612132,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"djehuty"}
- 6 votes
{"commentId":1612250,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1611177,"authorDomain":"PrimarySources"}
Hahahahaha.
Celestina, you are truly demented!
I loved this. Especially the pseudo-scientific approach. And the fact that you have minions.
Hahahaha. Happy Easter!
{"commentId":1611177,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"PrimarySources"}
- 9 votes
#7 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 1:12 PM EDT{"commentId":1611679,"authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
Thank you.
{"commentId":1611679,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
- 5 votes
{"commentId":1611822,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1611210,"authorDomain":"stolte-sawa"}
Many of these experiments made me cry. Bunnies...*sniff*...fear death by water.
Maybe...?
{"commentId":1611210,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"stolte-sawa"}
- 10 votes
#9 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 1:34 PM EDT{"commentId":1612380,"authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
Chinese water torture.
These things are food right? I must sample one.
We shall make it a challenge. Gather up some famous snack foods and taste test them all.
-Dave
{"commentId":1612380,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1612909,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
Blah!!!
What's the ickiest snack food in your neck of the woods Dave?
{"commentId":1612909,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1613098,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
And as to water, I am suspecting that if they can't be taken out by Scrubbing Bubbles and Drain-O, they are probably impervious to the gentler liquids. But I still have a pack of bunnies left. I can make sure...
ahh... sounds like a job for degreaser or DOT3 brake fluid... maybe, clorox (more readily avail.)
{"commentId":1613098,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1614940,"authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
What's the ickiest snack food in your neck of the woods Dave?
Cadbury'd creme egg? Hersheys peanut butter things... a strange import.
We tend to not eat things that are made entirely of chemicals.
Fig rolls? Fig newtons round your way I suppose.
It's all good really. No twinkies, koolaid or Baskin-Robbins.
Yeah it's a snack food drought over here.
-Dave
{"commentId":1614940,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
- 6 votes
{"commentId":1614943,"authorDomain":"hemphill"}
pickeled pigs feet probably wins here.
{"commentId":1614943,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"hemphill"}
- 2 votes
{"commentId":1615511,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
Chicken-flavoured Twisties are pretty yukky- lots of colouring and msg. They started off as an Australian snack but I think you can buy them in the UK now.
Rocky Road is bleg!
Pickled pigs' feet... I just watched something about them and a blender which I don't think I'll send a link to!
{"commentId":1615511,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 5 votes
{"commentId":1616248,"authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
Yeah we've got snickers, mars, bounty, malteasers, loads of bars and stuff,
the thing is they're all good, quite a low tolerance here for things that suck.
Potato chips, jelly babies, wine gums, polos, mints, all that kind of crap.
It just tends to be made of things like chocolate, as opposed to chemicals.
The local marshmallows are called "Flumps". Hilarious word.
A few years ago there was a candy bar called wispa and it was taken off the market,
so a group of fans pulled a stunt at the Glastonbury festival, by climbing on stage with a banner that said "Bring back the wispa".
It's back.
Disgusting snack foods... marmite. Pork faggots sound pretty unappetising.
Tripe enjoys a certain popularity over in england.
Turnips. I don't think turnips are actually edible, someone is lying to us.
-Dave
{"commentId":1616248,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
- 7 votes
{"commentId":1616382,"authorDomain":"djehuty"}
Baby turnips are lovely, then some idiot decides they want more bang for their buck...
Marmite is the kraft peanut butter of food. They added sugar. Why?
Have you ever wondered how many foods, like tripe, exist solely so that the locals can laugh quietly behind the counters of their "ye olde traditional bistros" while the tourists eat crap no sane person would seriously put in their mouth in a million years?
{"commentId":1616382,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"djehuty"}
- 7 votes
{"commentId":1616652,"authorDomain":"melonhead"}
Marmite has sugar? When!!?? I just ran over to my pantry & the jar I have doesn't list sugar, but it's a few months old. Is Marmite sold in the US different? I love it on rye toast with lots of butter - or - in oatmeal with flax meal & buttermilk, a.k.a. my "feedbag breakfast."
{"commentId":1616652,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"melonhead"}
- 2 votes
{"commentId":1616800,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
Marmite has sugar? When!!??
I just looked at the web page and I think it must be the vegetable and celery extracts that give it a sweet flavour. Compared to Vegemite, which is what I eat at home, it's sweet and slightly too much! Have you had Vegemite before urbane?
{"commentId":1616800,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1616845,"authorDomain":"melonhead"}
I believe we had a cellist from NZ who fixed "mousetraps" for us - isn't that Vegemite on toast? It was about 30 years ago.
{"commentId":1616845,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"melonhead"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1616978,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
Mousetraps! I had never heard of them until a second ago :)
Had a look online and found out that they are toasted vegemite and cheese sandwiches. Wow!! I ate lots of those as a child but not toasted- these were on fresh, white packet bread... eek! I can still smell my lunchbox, a combination of vegemite, sweaty cheese, warm butter and orange skin. Even a double layer of cling film never kept the orange smell out of my sandwiches!
{"commentId":1616978,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1617797,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
Wow, you got oranges? Maybe I'm showing my age, but to this day the smell oranges and tangerines remind me of Christmas because they were more difficult to get when I was a small child and we only had them as a treat in our stockings. We would get an apple, if we got fruit in our lunch boxes. And for us it was bologna with mustard, a combination I now loathe.
Vegemite. I've never had Vegemite. I have friends in Aus who have promised for two years to send me some. There was even a scare for us, because she was ready to send the box and I got that hoax email about the US outlawing vegemite and I had to track it down for sure and the moment passed. LOL
{"commentId":1617797,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1619407,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
I think oranges were just an everyday thing when I was growing up; the smell of Kindergarten for me is apple-infused with milk because that was our morning tea and I used to drink the milk with the apple still in my mouth.
And I ate bologna and tomato sauce sandwiches sometimes- bologna is not food, lol, although I did see the biggest Mortadella ever in Naples recently and it actually looked a bit yummy!
It looked like this and was being sold on the street in huge, on-the-spot-cut chunks on big slabs of fresh bread. They sold it by weight! That was cool!
A bit further down the street was a deep-fried pizza stall. I had never seen those before either. Naples is a really amazing place!
{"commentId":1619407,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 2 votes
{"commentId":1620390,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
The pizza looks tempting. The sausage looks too much like headcheese for me to try it. There some things it's just better you never see made. Among those are any kind of sausage and cottage cheese.
{"commentId":1620390,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1620536,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
Cadbury'd creme egg
Icky? HERESY! BURN HIM
{"commentId":1620536,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1611250,"authorDomain":"deatienza"}
Ha. I hate peeps. Awesome!
{"commentId":1611250,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"deatienza"}
- 12 votes
#10 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 1:48 PM EDT{"commentId":1611922,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
Interesting, I was thinking s'mores might be a good use for leftover peeps.
{"commentId":1611922,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 6 votes
{"commentId":1616674,"authorDomain":"melonhead"}
Heh, next year the New York Times will pick up on the North Carolina Peep Roast & it'll be all trendy. I can just picture the restaurant reviews:
"An amuse-bouche of roasted peep with a Dr. Pepper reduction glacé, garnished with a solitary Goetze's Caramel Creme merely hinted at the culinary Weltanschauung of Manhattan's newest eatery."
Or something like that.
{"commentId":1616674,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"melonhead"}
- 7 votes
{"commentId":1618153,"authorDomain":"melonhead"}
Thanks. I didn't even get to the Moonpie soufflé. This could be some menu.
{"commentId":1618153,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"melonhead"}
- 6 votes
{"commentId":1620542,"authorDomain":"Sim2Luv"}
This is starting sound more like it should be on foodies!
{"commentId":1620542,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"Sim2Luv"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1624058,"authorDomain":"melonhead"}
Peeps are food?
Goetze's Caramel Cremes are food?
Moonpies?
I don't think so.
{"commentId":1624058,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"melonhead"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1624336,"authorDomain":"Sim2Luv"}
I crave Moon pies and RC Cola when I was pregnant with my third son!
{"commentId":1624336,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"Sim2Luv"}
- 5 votes
{"commentId":1624350,"authorDomain":"hemphill"}
I crave moonpies and grape nehi whenever it gets above 75 degrees...
{"commentId":1624350,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"hemphill"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1625345,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1625506,"authorDomain":"hemphill"}
slush puppies are getting harder to find though...
{"commentId":1625506,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"hemphill"}
- 2 votes
{"commentId":1625531,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1625553,"authorDomain":"hemphill"}
One can only hope...
{"commentId":1625553,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"hemphill"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1625710,"authorDomain":"cobbs"}
At a Boy Scout summer camp I used to work at about 5 years ago we would mix the flavored syrups for Slush Puppies to make some interesting blends. Names like Lake Bottom Bog and Parade Ground Parahana sold well. Got to have a catchy name for your product.
{"commentId":1625710,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"cobbs"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1611286,"authorDomain":"LAUHAL63"}
{"commentId":1611286,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"LAUHAL63"}
- 7 votes
#11 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 2:04 PM EDT{"commentId":1611369,"authorDomain":"cobbs"}
Just a side note: when you can, check out the Best if Eaten by Date on a pack of Peeps.
I once bought a cart load (hey they were half off) and had a pack that I didn't get around to for over 2 years. My daughter told me to toss them until I pointed out that the Best Eaten by date was still 2 months off.
After a nuclear war Keith Richards and the cockroaches will be living on twinkes and peeps
{"commentId":1611369,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"cobbs"}
- 4 votes
#12 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 2:38 PM EDT{"commentId":1611621,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1614271,"authorDomain":"katrixx"}
Peeps taste much better when they're stale. They're still pretty gross, though.
{"commentId":1614271,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"katrixx"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1611401,"authorDomain":"melonhead"}
PETA will get you for this!
or maybe PEEP: People Eschewing Entropy of Peeps.
So glad you didn't microwave - that's so been done.
{"commentId":1611401,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"melonhead"}
- 5 votes
#13 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 2:49 PM EDT{"commentId":1612091,"authorDomain":"melonhead"}
wait until the supersized GMO Peeps find you!
{"commentId":1612091,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"melonhead"}
- 6 votes
{"commentId":1613101,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
If it's any consolation, Oatmeal Creme Pies and Zebra cakes make good items to abuse as well... not as funny, and delicious as they are, sometimes you've got to just make a mess destroying things in abstract ways... and hey... don't forget the hollow chocolate bunnies.... black cats work wonders on those
{"commentId":1613101,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1613288,"authorDomain":"melonhead"}
In our home, being of the non-Easter persuasion, the cat (black btw) went after the apricot hamantaschen - as a toy, not an edible. Batted one all over the kitchen floor.
{"commentId":1613288,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"melonhead"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1614172,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
the cat (black btw)
I'm thinking Shawn was referring to pyro-technics. :D
{"commentId":1614172,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1616678,"authorDomain":"melonhead"}
Whadda I know? :)
{"commentId":1616678,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"melonhead"}
- 2 votes
{"commentId":1616822,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
indeed... Black cats, lady fingers... whatever you wanna call 'em.... though i do also have a black meow cat, and... it wont explode.
{"commentId":1616822,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1611468,"authorDomain":"SimplyTRUE"}
Celestina,
When I saw the title of you article, I said to myself, "I'm not reading this." It's Easter and she is purposely destroying my big money brainwashed commercialized symbol of Easter, Peeps. And then it hit me, Peeps are nauseating and I am not really sure what they are made of. Your experiment with Draino only proved that Peeps and roaches will be the only things that survive a Nuclear Strike. Thanks to the dedication that you and your scientific staff has shown, I have found the strength to write my own controversial Newsvine only exclusive article, "Karate Kats, are you living with a killer?"
PS: You might want the rethink washing down Peeps with Whisky. Happy Easter :)
{"commentId":1611468,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"SimplyTRUE"}
- 5 votes
#15 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 3:13 PM EDT{"commentId":1616883,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
Your experiment with Draino only proved that Peeps and roaches will be the only things that survive a Nuclear Strike.
And dandelions. The reason it is my official plant. We both can survive anything. :D
{"commentId":1616883,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1617092,"authorDomain":"cobbs"}
I can't wait for the dandelions to flower for a couple of reasons. First it will mean that winter is really over (it lasts way to long up here in the mountains). Second reason is that I pick the flowers, make sure there is no stem attached, dip them in batter and fry up a batch of Dandelion Fritters. Delicious
Contrary to the impression my other comments here may have made I do eat healthier things then peeps. Hmmmmm wonder if you can batter and fry peep? I know you can a tweenkie.
{"commentId":1617092,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"cobbs"}
- 5 votes
{"commentId":1619419,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
dandelion fritters! Nice! Are they bitter?
{"commentId":1619419,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1619531,"authorDomain":"cobbs"}
Not if you make sure to get all the stem off. The bitter taste in danelions is in the stems and leaves. The flowers are just tasty.
I used to take them into work and a lot of guys would tell me they were posion. Until one of the old timers came up and grabbed a handful. He told me that dandelions kept him alive when he was a POW.
{"commentId":1619531,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"cobbs"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1619646,"authorDomain":"spookybf"}
I am so going to make dandelion fritters.Squash blossoms are great tasting and I can imagine the similarity. I can't wait!
{"commentId":1619646,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"spookybf"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1619920,"authorDomain":"cobbs"}
Flowers are good eats.
From what I can find dandelion blossoms have more vitamin C than an orange and are loaded with iron. Just what all animals need after a long winter. That's why they are some of the first to bloom.
Only cook up the early blossoms. Later in the summer they do get a bit bitter. Best eaten the same day as they do get soggy if left around and I haven't found a way to keep them too long.
If you have day lillies around try frying up a few. They have a peppery taste. Nice to add to a stir fry. They cook real fast so watch them.
{"commentId":1619920,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"cobbs"}
- 2 votes
{"commentId":1620424,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
I suppose telling you that the dandelions never stop blooming where I live will not endear me to you. It is a problem, though, as I like dandelions greens and I never get them truly early enough for them to be at their best.
Ah, dandelions, I love you. The perfect plant, every bit usable from the tender leaves as greens, to the blossoms as wine and, now I know, fritters to the roots dried and roasted and used as beverage.
I love dandelions SO MUCH, I wrote a sonnet to them.
To a Dandelion (1975)
Dandelion, careless and free,
Where'er the suns shines you may grow
And rear your golden head for all to see;
But in the garden where the gardener's hoe
Sends you to an undeserved end.
T'is said you are not as fair as the gentle rose
For you are yellow, not some lovely blend
Of rich red; you wear not silken clothes.
No one has tamed you yet, rough flower.
And Man despises your wild ways.
But I would rather be like you a single hour,
Than like the helpless rose for all my days.
{"commentId":1620424,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 5 votes
{"commentId":1621035,"authorDomain":"cobbs"}
Someone once asked my old neighbor why he didn't spray to kill the dandelions in his yard. His answer was that he liked yellow. I think he'd like your sonnet as much as I did.
When I moved up here to the mountains I noticed the absence of dandelions along the roadside. Back home we'd get huge ones there. Up here there are a few in peoples yards but they do not grow wild. Not sure if it's the make up of the soil, the extreme cold in winter or the altitude, but I miss them.
{"commentId":1621035,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"cobbs"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1621095,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1623099,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
nasturtium flowers and young leaves are great in salad. You can pickle the green seed heads but I haven't done that before..... and those little cute flowers called heartsease- I love them!
{"commentId":1623099,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1623377,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
And chickweed...mmm. The only problem with chickweed is that it doesn't stick around long enough.
OH, man . .chickweed. . now I'm hungry. I love that stuff.
{"commentId":1623377,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1623709,"authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
In Ireland we call dandellions "Piss-the-beds".
Stops kids picking them.
-Dave
{"commentId":1623709,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1624341,"authorDomain":"Sim2Luv"}
I could go for some poke salad myself...but, alas...it doesn't seem to be anywhere around here in SoCal.
{"commentId":1624341,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"Sim2Luv"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1611529,"authorDomain":"winsomecowboy"}
Impressive, twisted, dare I say...droll.
heh heh Heh
{"commentId":1611529,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"winsomecowboy"}
- 10 votes
#16 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 3:37 PM EDT{"commentId":1611541,"authorDomain":"bigmomma"}
All I can say is your sick....but that was kind of funny....so maybe I'm sick too....
{"commentId":1611541,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"bigmomma"}
- 6 votes
{"commentId":1611573,"authorDomain":"winsomecowboy"}
Well if you want to break it down, humor is a tool for the release of tension and a burning, laughing elmo pits your natural empathy [subconscious] of a burning animated figure against your [again subconscious] trigger to laugh when exposed to laughter.
Then there's the conscious recognition of the emotional sterility of the setup which creates an additional feedback loop.
*sigh* Being me is a multilayered penance.
{"commentId":1611573,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"winsomecowboy"}
- 6 votes
{"commentId":1611654,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1611551,"authorDomain":"hemphill"}
It's a shame you didn't have a jar of acetone to try on one...
{"commentId":1611551,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"hemphill"}
- 3 votes
#17 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 3:44 PM EDT{"commentId":1614319,"authorDomain":"hemphill"}
don't forget the microwave, that one's always fun.
{"commentId":1614319,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"hemphill"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1611792,"authorDomain":"Brad-Leclerc"}
HAH, great stuff. As often is the case, fire seems to be the answer :)
{"commentId":1611792,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"Brad-Leclerc"}
- 5 votes
#18 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 5:36 PM EDT{"commentId":1616887,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
Fire is always the answer.
I have a friend who says, "There is no problem that can't be solved with high explosives."
{"commentId":1616887,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1616930,"authorDomain":"Brad-Leclerc"}
"There is no problem that can't be solved with high explosives."
Wonderfully, this is true even if fire IS the problem. Science FTW!
{"commentId":1616930,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"Brad-Leclerc"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1619810,"authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
Fire is always the answer.
That or my personal favourite tool, the "persuader".
It's a claw hammer. Then next step up is the "punisher" 2 pounds of pure ball peen
(say that's what she said I dare you).
The final solution is the ass end of my axe.
Occasionally I'll smash a toaster just to show the other appliances I mean business.
-Dave
{"commentId":1619810,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
- 1 vote
{"commentId":1619853,"authorDomain":"hemphill"}
I occasionally sacrifice a server in front of the others, just to make sure they listen. The data center folks always look at me like I am insane, but they keep their distance, so who cares.
{"commentId":1619853,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"hemphill"}
- 1 vote
{"commentId":1619928,"authorDomain":"cobbs"}
When a computer is being balky I show it a toaster being dipped in a bucket of water. That scares it into working.
Some times you just have to sacrifice a lower lifeform. :-)
{"commentId":1619928,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"cobbs"}
- 1 vote
{"commentId":1619935,"authorDomain":"hemphill"}
I like using one of its peers, I feel it makes more of an impact.
Kind of the Ford Prefect approach to system administration...
{"commentId":1619935,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"hemphill"}
- 1 vote
{"commentId":1611844,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
Brilliant, evil scientists!! I think you can all rub your hands together gleefully on a job well-done :o)
Great photos! I really like the dramatic demise of Bunnies B and D.
{"commentId":1611844,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 6 votes
#19 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 5:55 PM EDT{"commentId":1611866,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
I can't help it. Every time I watch the bunny in the blender, I crack up. I know I'm going to hell, don't bother telling me.
{"commentId":1611866,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"celestina"}
- 7 votes
#20 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 6:05 PM EDT{"commentId":1611919,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
My 9 year old and I just watched the clip 3 times! Then I had to play it again but pause every half-second so he could pinpoint the exact time it was sliced in half. Needless to say, we giggled a lot!
As steveoutdoorrec said about his kids on lauhal's column;
Both the boy-child & girl-child grew up to be nicely twisted. I'm so proud. :-)
Yay!!! I am so with him on that one. We all get gold stars for expert creative parenting :o)
{"commentId":1611919,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 10 votes
{"commentId":1612587,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
Twisted children make a more interesting world. It is our obligation as parents to help them onto the proper path.
remind me to send you a video of my son sometime....
next year I plan on lighting a peep on fire while its on a drill... waiting until its melt(ish) and then pulling hte trigger - to draw and quarter it, so to speak.
{"commentId":1612587,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1612606,"authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
Twisted children make a more interesting world. It is our obligation as parents to help them onto the proper path.
And our obligation as siblings. I've got a ten year old sister that can swing a sword,
loves gun fighter movies and Doctor Who. She's the @!$%#inest kid in town.
-Dave
{"commentId":1612606,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1612911,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
lighting a peep on fire while its on a drill... waiting until its melt(ish) and then pulling hte trigger
wear a fire suit Shawn, or get behind a Mythbusteresque screen thing!
{"commentId":1612911,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 5 votes
{"commentId":1613017,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
wear a fire suit Shawn, or get behind a Mythbusteresque screen thing!
well I didn't intend on it being upright... to the side or over a wall, but yes... I'm not going to light myself on fire. Maybe I'll start small and use a wheel grinder on the first couple...
{"commentId":1613017,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1613088,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
Glad to hear that :o)
I have worked in a restaurant kitchen and molten sugar hurts!!
{"commentId":1613088,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1613096,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
I have worked in a restaurant kitchen and molten sugar hurts!!
things only moments before that were ablaze tend to do that, hurt. But I'm on of those peoplethat has to touch a stove, not to see if its hot, but HOW hot.
{"commentId":1613096,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1613110,"authorDomain":"tamh"}
ouch!! :)
{"commentId":1613110,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"tamh"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1613320,"authorDomain":"djehuty"}
The specific heat capacity of sugar syrup is about 30% higher than depleted uranium. It's capable of melting through the crust of the earth at an acceleration of 9.1ms^2. It's worse than napalm.
Seriously. Look it up. Science cannot explain it.
{"commentId":1613320,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"djehuty"}
- 7 votes
{"commentId":1614183,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
The specific heat capacity of sugar syrup is about 30% higher than depleted uranium. It's capable of melting through the crust of the earth at an acceleration of 9.1ms^2. It's worse than napalm.
::fans self:: Oh, I like it when a man talks sciency.
{"commentId":1614183,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 6 votes
{"commentId":1616825,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
The specific heat capacity of sugar syrup is about 30% higher than depleted uranium. It's capable of melting through the crust of the earth at an acceleration of 9.1ms^2. It's worse than napalm.
Seriously. Look it up. Science cannot explain it.
I'd actually like to heat water up to its flashpoint, but the police frown on industrial fires.
{"commentId":1616825,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 2 votes
{"commentId":1617808,"authorDomain":"brendamayer"}
Twisted children make a more interesting world. It is our obligation as parents to help them onto the proper path.
You'll know you've really hit it out of the park when some of the neighborhood parents don't let their kids play with yours. When that happens it's a double high five moment since you know for sure you're doing it right.
Heh.
{"commentId":1617808,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"brendamayer"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1612002,"authorDomain":"darkknightjrk"}
You are a mean, twisted, and scandalous wench. That is a terrible thing what you did.
Keep up the good work. :D
Mad Scientists UNITE!
{"commentId":1612002,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"darkknightjrk"}
- 5 votes
#21 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 6:53 PM EDT{"commentId":1612232,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1614194,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
Hey, my fav Mad Scientist site hasn't done peep torture. The closest was a Peep Mobile. I'll have to send them a message and see if they have any plans for their leftovers this year.
{"commentId":1614194,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1612041,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
Awesome. I did something similar this morning... but it involved a microwave, rubbing alcohol, a tumbler glass, and.... a series of knives. Oh and a pair of scissors as well as a shotgun (10G - messy peeps).
{"commentId":1612041,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 5 votes
#22 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 7:06 PM EDT{"commentId":1612236,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1612560,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
no... you can't have fun with only one peep. Normally, I bite their heads off and let them harden, becuase it amuses me. And, headless they can't scream (see also facebook)...
However, a peep stuffed in the barrel of a benelli 10G... makes marshmallow mist...
microwaving a peep is funny to me because its like a merry-go-round of death... they just melt, like that guy from Raiders of the Lost Arc. they become this gooey mess of what WAS a peep if you put them in long enough. I suggest an old margarine tub and about 3-5 minutes.
Rubbing alcohol and a match is definitely awesome. Its not a slow burn, but instant - and you can launch them while they're on fire so that when they hit the wall, its a flaming gooey mess....
a tumbler glass with two or three peeps with alcohol on them is kind of neat. they melt and then sort of mix together - much like Tetsuo Shima in Akira when his body loses control of itself (which is actualy the scene that played in my head while doing this), but can be as trippy as Tetsuo of the 1989 Jap film.
The knives are just fun to stab at them with... make them stick in the peeps and jsut leave it, or ALMOST sever the heads, leaving them to hang by a thin flap of marshmallow. I also carved out their eyes (on a couple)
The scissors, I just cut their asses off... no real reason, I guess...
its sort of warped, but... I was entertained.
{"commentId":1612560,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1612580,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
Also, I guess if you look at from a 'disgustipated' point of view, its easier to find it funny
{"commentId":1612580,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 2 votes
{"commentId":1614274,"authorDomain":"gwenny"}
Shawn, you have made it even harder for me to find a companion. It was already statistically unlikely I could find someone. Here's the math I did for an LJ entry:
I've done the math, as sucky as my math is. First, the estimated population of California is 36,553,215. (Don't do LD relationships and I'm not moving for anyone ever again.) Males account for just a bit less than half, so 18,276,607.5. Subtract all the guys who are too old and too young (I use 40-60 years) and you are left with 4,798,618. Minus 10% for gays and that's 479861.8. Now take 10% of that who are possibly religiously compatible with me, or 47,986.18. Factor in that about 1/3 are Asian men, for whom I have absolutely no attraction. . .not a race thing, a pheromone thing. We are down to just over 32k. I couldn't find the data on CA, but the nationwide marriage rate is 59%. Down to 18,880. Factor in intellectual compatibility as determined by percentile (I'm in the 1st percentile) and you are at 188.8. Now, of that possible 188 men, how many AREN'T in Mensa and play WoW.
::snicker:: Yeah, I could have saved you a lot of reading by invoking WoW first off, huh? Evil Gwen.
Now I had to add "thinks of creative and potentially dangerous things to do with food stuff for entertainment. DAMN YOU!
LOL
{"commentId":1614274,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"gwenny"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1616839,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
Now I had to add "thinks of creative and potentially dangerous things to do with food stuff for entertainment. DAMN YOU!
LOL
well... foodstuff is only the tip of my monkey wrench iceberg.
{"commentId":1616839,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 5 votes
{"commentId":1612150,"authorDomain":"thebeanfield"}
Too damn funny. Major kudos, complements, etc.
{"commentId":1612150,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"thebeanfield"}
- 4 votes
#23 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 7:49 PM EDT{"commentId":1612239,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1612179,"authorDomain":"Kiser"}
Celestina, you're going to hell.
Peeps will be your primary torturers during your stay - hope you enjoy it.
----Jesus is not allowed to read below this line----
But it was flippin' sweet. I'm looking forward to you doing this again next year (you better) and this time don't let your husband stop you from hooking that bunny up to your car battery. It will be overkill, but overkill is AWESOME.
{"commentId":1612179,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"Kiser"}
- 5 votes
#24 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 8:02 PM EDT{"commentId":1612230,"authorDomain":"celestina"}
{"commentId":1612390,"authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
It will be overkill, but overkill is AWESOME.
My personal motto - If you're going to do it, over do it.
*Busts out cigars and scotch*
-Dave
{"commentId":1612390,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
- 5 votes
{"commentId":1612585,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
*Busts out cigars and scotch*
hardly overkill...
Joints and 1/5ths of Crown - now were talking
{"commentId":1612585,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1612621,"authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
You and I are very different men. But I imagine the party would be a hoot.
-Dave
{"commentId":1612621,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"davidmcgirr"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":1612639,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
I really don't do drugs... (they do me)
seriously, I'm kidding...i really do not do drugs (anymore)... but i am down with Crown
{"commentId":1612639,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1612718,"authorDomain":"spookybf"}
...awww dudes, I just twisted the prettiest blunt and popped a cap, put the feet up and tuned in "American Experience"; Malcolm X...
{"commentId":1612718,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"spookybf"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":1613020,"authorDomain":"ejronin"}
well... I'm a giving guy... you can have my share of blunts...wait.. Philly or White Owl?
{"commentId":1613020,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"ejronin"}
- 2 votes
{"commentId":1612521,"authorDomain":"stuckinthemiddle"}
this made my already fabulous day even better.
{"commentId":1612521,"threadId":"238883","contentId":"1384949","authorDomain":"stuckinthemiddle"}
- 7 votes
#25 - Sun Mar 23, 2008 10:17 PM EDT{"canLink":false,"threadId":"238883","isPrivate":false}
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